I was hoping I would never have to see Lily go madly in love! I know she is a feeling, functional human being. But how unfair to give a child's mind an adult emotion. Lily has fallen in love 2x already! Both times with a cartoon character. Does she realize it is not a real human? I don't think so. And maybe we are encouraging her love by printing out pictures and teasing her about being in love. Maybe it all would've passed quickly if we never acknowledged it.
Her first love lasted 5 long months. She would listen to songs and cry big crocodile tears. She would draw pictures and letters to this love and want to mail them off. She had pictures taped up to her walls that she drew. She never stopped swooning. And than one night she came out with her suitcase packed and told me she is leaving to live with him in the castle! OH NO! Thats when I knew this had gone to far! I was so afraid she was going to leave in the middle of the night and get lost. She had memorized her address in middle school but did she still remember it if that happened? I know she knew how to pull the chair over to the door and unlock it. I thought HELL my life is over! I will have to sleep on the couch every night so I can guard the front door! Lily refused to unpack her suitcase. I would unpack it while she was at school and she would just repack it and try to hide it. So I did the only thing that was left to do to persuade her never to leave the house alone. I scared the heck out of her. I made up a grand story of monsters who lived outside the door. And if she left she would never see us again. YES! I AM A BAD MOTHER! But I was so scared of her running away! And I panicked! So, Lily, being smart, thought, ok there are monsters outside the front door, so I will go thru my bedroom window. And that is what I found her trying to do that night. A pillow was under her covers to look like her laying in bed and her bedroom window open. She hadn't made her escape yet! But what if mothers intuition didn't kick in! She would've went out her window. And where the HELL did she learn to stuff her bed like she was laying in there! All I could think of too scare her is "LiLy there are spiders outside your window!" That was enough to keep her window closed. She was in her room constantly talking to this character. She cleared out a drawer and that is where he lived!
That love faded out and was replaced by a new love, Kion from the Lion Guard. And it was around her Birthday. We got her some Kion things; a stuffed Kion, bedding and made her some lion guard tattoos. So we fell into the love game again! She goes around growling even more than she use too. And she is now talking about having a Kion baby. That really breaks my heart to think she thinks of that. Will that ever be in her future? That brings on all the fears I had when she was just born and I mourned all the things that she would never be able to experience.
I guess it is a hormonal drive in our genes that tell us to feel love. To pursue love. And it is that way no matter who you are.
I am gonna move this right into another topic since it goes hand in hand: Self pleasure. I can't say the "M" word. It is just so in your face! And I don't think I can take this much further than it happens! Once the menstruation happened so did that drive for pleasure. And it is extremely uncomfortable. I am trying to teach other people in the house to knock on Lilys door. Don't just walk in! and laugh at her. Give her some privacy. And never LAUGH AT HER!
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